Mindvalley Founder Reveals Why You Feel Alone (By Design)

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When we are born, our driving need is to find connection and avoid rejection. What I see today is the opposite: we are all finding rejection and avoiding connection, and then we blame ourselves for feeling lonely. My guest this week says that is not an accident, and it is not your fault.

Vishen Lakhiani created Mindvalley, wrote The Code of the Extraordinary Mind, and gave us the word “brules”, his name for the rules we never agreed to follow. In this conversation he is blunt about who profits when we compare ourselves, why he has banned social media in his own home, and why the single most profitable thing anyone can do is take human beings and separate them. We also talk about the career path that leads a whole generation into jobs with a fifty per cent depression rate, why he believes no one person should carry all of your love, and what he would delete from the world if he could.

TIMESTAMPS:

0:00 Trailer/Intro
1:00 Meet Vishen Lakhiani: Mindvalley, A-Fest and building AI that connects
1:40 Find connection, avoid rejection: why we now do the opposite
2:00 The problem isn’t AI, it’s who profits from it
2:20 Why he banned social media for his daughter
2:40 Comparison is the thief of joy
3:20 Thigh gaps, bikini bridges and impossible beauty standards
3:40 Wolverine, and the male body image crisis nobody discusses
4:00 What happens to testosterone below 12% body fat
5:00 The rules women were handed about their bodies
6:00 “We’re agreeing to rules we didn’t make”
7:00 Doctor, lawyer, engineer: the cultural rule he grew up with
8:00 The Microsoft internship and the night at Bill Gates’ house
9:00 Getting himself fired on purpose, playing Age of Empires
10:00 Building Mindvalley to $140 million by ignoring the advice
11:50 Brules: the bullshit rules running your life
13:00 Why Russian has two words for blue, and how language shapes reality
14:00 Swimming in rules you cannot see
15:00 Religion, sin, and whether you believe you deserve good things
16:00 The number one rule humanity should throw out
17:00 Vertical growth versus horizontal growth
18:00 Why separating people is the most profitable brainwashing there is
19:00 “We are not separate from the other”
20:00 My rules for language, and the words I will never use
21:00 The missile alert, the plane, and what my daughter said
22:00 The rules behind building Mindvalley
23:00 The myth of the safe, established career
24:00 The profession with a 50% clinical depression rate
25:00 Which rules are real, and which are brules
26:00 Cupcakes, scaling and what AI makes possible now
27:00 Why work that creates connection will always have a market
28:00 Tribal leadership: the five levels explained
30:00 Microsoft as a level four tribe
31:00 When Volvo gave away the seatbelt patent
32:00 See me, acknowledge me, like me, love me
33:00 The bullshit path to love
34:00 Divorced since 2019, and still close friends
35:00 Why no one person should be able to break your heart
36:00 Dating apps, and the loneliness underneath them
37:00 Go and meet a human being, not a date
38:00 Falling in love with yourself first
39:00 “I would rather be alone than with the wrong person”
40:00 How to stay friends with an ex
41:00 Forgiving the younger version of you
43:00 The 17th century law still shaping modern marriage
44:00 Hearts break and repair. That is what they are built to do.
45:00 What forgiveness does to your body
46:00 The rules of education
47:00 Inside Mindvalley University
49:00 Shaolin monks, samurais and 200 classes
51:00 The poster in his daughter’s school in North London
52:00 The rule he would add, and the one he would delete
53:00 QUICKFIRE: his one sentence rules for love and money
54:00 Treat friendship with the diligence you treat money
55:00 One hour a day on your body
56:00 Every stage is a dream dying or one coming to birth
57:00 His books, and where to find him

Connect with Vishen Lakhiani:

Website: https://www.mindvalley.com
Instagram: @vishen

Read The Code of the Extraordinary Mind

Connect with Marisa Peer:

Website: https://www.marisapeer.com
Buy Your Mind Your Rules: https://link.rtt.com/4yve09F
Instagram: @marisapeertherapy

Learn more about Rapid Transformational Therapy and Training: https://link.rtt.com/4AqoasP

#VishenLakhiani #MarisaPeer #YourMindYourRules #Mindvalley #Loneliness #Brules #LimitingBeliefs #SocialMedia #SelfLove #Relationships #Connection #PersonalDevelopment #RTT

Your Mind, Your Rules - with Marisa Peer

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